Friday, June 1, 2012

Time

June 1st. It's time. Time to race and time to put all that hard work into action. 

I'm sitting here staring at the blank white box waiting to be filled with my words, my thoughts. Instead, I am wondering if I have enough time to truly write before the boys run in the house for bed.

I'm wondering if I have enough time to make the rattlesnake costume for Nick by Monday.  If I will have enough time to squeeze in a bike ride before the rain begins tomorrow morning. I feel like I spend a lot of time worrying about Time!!! It kind of drives me nuts.

_________________________

Ok.. that random last post. I am no longer a new triathlete. I'm not the youngest or the least experienced. I've been around the block a bit. And because of this, I think. I think about all the process. I think about what lies ahead for me. I go back in time and remember all I have accomplished and how I did it. What made it work?

 I have had so many things ricocheting through my head lately. What? What is that I need? What do I want from all of this? Am I doing this right?

I have learned a few things about myself. I have learned to accept things about myself and also, expect things from others.

When things really count, I am able to maintain strong focus. I am determined and I work very very hard. I am ambitious and like to go after things that are hard and challenging. There is no sweeter victory than one you reached by overcoming huge obstacles.

I hate to admit it, but I also like the approval of others. Sure. Who doesn't?  I appreciate when I get a nod from someone I respect. And, I strive to earn the respect of people around me. People I  care about.

I have to have reasons. There are a whole pile of reasons that I go after it in this sport.  Occasionally, I lose sight of my why. . From time to time, I stumble and I question. I definitely lose focus and drive. But so far, these have been  quick diversions and before too long, I'm back on track. 

And with that.. I'm out of time. Here come the kiddos.... more on this soon.....

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