This post might not make much sense!

I have been so busy and scattered lately!! I can't seem to remember what I need to do from one minute to the next. When growing up, I remember hearing comments about 'avoiding holiday stress.' I couldn't imagine! Christmas was the BEST season ever!! I loved all the hoopla! And for the record, I still do. I love the lights and the songs and the excitement over Santa. I get into it. But as a Mom of 3...I now understand the stress. My goal each year is to CHILL OUT and just go with it. Yah.....that doesn't happen with me too much. I'm just way too type A and revved up most of the time. I can't deny that. As I approach 40, one thing I can Not do is deny who I am. It's just me.

I can't compose a meaningful post today. I have too many random things going on right now. So I won't try. A few bullets from my brain these days.

• I'm not ready to be 40. It doesn't sound right to me. I did an Ironman in July this year so I could say I was an Ironman before I turned 40. It didn't help.


• I hope Tommy and his friends had fun at the Secret Agent party last weekend. I worked really really hard on it. I'm not a creative person and it took me many hours to put the activities together. Many of the things I had planned, we didn't even use. The kids couldn't focus that long. That was a bummer. But most of all, I really hope my little boy had fun. He said he did. I hope he was being sincere and not polite.


• My foot is better. I can run 2.4 miles without pain now. But I'm so slow. SO SLOW! I see the doc on Friday and Pray he says I'm good to go. I really really need to go outside and run without fear.


• I am realizing I don't kick very much when I swim. When I pull 100s I am only a teeny bit slower than when I swim them. Hmmm. I think it is actually ok for triathlon swimming. I save my legs for the biking and running. However, I will be racing Faster this summer and think I can step it up a notch with the ole' kick. I need to work on this.


• I love my new Splish suits. I wore one today and it made me feel faster in the pool. there is nothing like a tight new suit.


• One of my favorite things is coming down early early in the morning, when the house is still dark and quiet, and turning on the Christmas tree lights.


• why can't I ever get my shopping done? Perhaps it's because I don't love shopping.


• I wanted to run the 10 mile road race in Cape in February. I was very unhappy with my race last year and had hoped to hit it hard in 2010. Now, I'm not so sure I can do that. This stress fx injury has really hit me hard.
• The High school kids who practice when I swim in the morning really need to learn how to do push ups.
• Maybe I can get all my shopping done before October next year.
• I can't wait to watch the Hawaii Ironman on Saturday. I'll never watch that race the same way again. It wasn't long ago that I would watch that while wrapping Christmas presents and just be blown Away by how Anyone could ever do such a crazy event. And now, I can say I DID IT! You just never know what life will bring.
• 40. Nope. It still doesn't sound right.
• Sometimes,the person who can handle everything, can't. Sometimes the person who is on top of things, isn't. Sometimes, the person who is tough and strong feels weak and miserable. I'm just saying. Sometimes that happens.


• Substitute teaching is really really hard. And tiring. Hats off to teachers who work with the little ones every day. I appreciate my own children more and more every time I go in there.


• I hope Christmas is a happy and magical day for my boys. They deserve it. They are really special little people. I will work hard to make next week amazing for them.