Ready to rock

Here we go. The final push to Ironman. I think I've been doing pretty well with the training. The season has been a bit hard to judge since I haven't raced too much.
Mooseman came together well....so I think my fitness is on target.
5 weeks left.
That's not too long. I remember when it was 5 months....and that seemed close. Oh boy.
The past few weeks have been busy and intense. Starting June 7th with Mooseman Half Iron. I raced hard, put out good spilts and a 3rd place spot, and then ouch. I was so so tired after that. My body was extremely sore. I tried to swim two days after that race. How bad can swimming be? I mean, you're floating around in the water! And I'm a swimmer! Well, let me tell you folks. I couldn't even push my legs off the deck to dive in--- I just fell! I am not Kidding!
It was comical. I was sure the guard (whom I've known since I was 14) was going to stop me to see if I was ok. Of course "stop" is not the rigth word. Because I wasn't moving. I was pulling my way weakly to the deep end where I floated to the wall. There-25 yards. Only 1475 to go. Ha! I couldn't kick. I absolutely couldn't kick. I couldn't push off the wall. So I just floated away and attempted more pulling-but even the arms were weak. I stuck a pull buoy in and wiggled my way through several hundred yards before I gave up. There. What a workout. Way to get back at it Ange. Totally worth waking up at 4:33 (remember I said before-those 3 minutes help) and driving 35 minutes. Oh god. Training camp in 2 days??
Ok. Wednesday was an easy bike. I can't even remember the workout but I ended up pushing my legs around-barely-on the trainer. I did this so I woulnd't have to climb the 2 mile hill up to my house after the ride. Pathetic! But, I think smart. I have made peace with the need to recover after hard efforts.
My last post acknowledged that I did in fact survive training camp. It was so much fun, I performed alright, not great, but alright. I was definately still feeling the fatigue of racing hard. I race 100% when I race. And I paid for that. But in my head I knew that almost 5 hard hours of swimbikerun did help my long term fitness level. It was in the bank for July 26th.
During a few of those weeks I was feeling worried. Worried that I wasn't tough enough for 140.6 miles of swimbikerun. I was going through those feelings that I imagine many athletes go through-'what have I done?' "why am I doing this?"

It's Sunday June 21st. Father's Day. First day of summer.
And the day I am BACK! I wasn't really gone but my head is now in a fresh new place. I am not bored with the training---I can see the end. I don't have "time away from home guilt"-kids are home from school and I am spending ooodles of time with the little guys. I am rested. That is key. I have had a big training week but I also got tons-o-sleep. People talk about how key this is-and I agree-but sometimes it's tough. you all know the drill. Busy with life= parents up late! Or atleast too late for a 4:33 wake up. This past week I made a big effort to put other stuff aside (like free time after kids go to bed) and climb between the sheets myself. Ahhhh
It's like I flipped a switch. I feel great.
I am so excited. I am so excited to KICK MY ASS for this final peak training period. I do love to work hard. I thrive on the feeling of pushing past the pain. It fires me up. It makes me feel strong. I feel untouchable. I feel confident.
Yesterday I had a 20 mile run. I ran hills. Many many big hills. Up and down for 13 miles. The final 7 were flatter but I was already fatigued. Regardless, I was able to push the pace for the end. Sure, I had moments of "pain." I had moments of heavy legs and feet. But it passed. It didn't seem too bad. I was ready to stop-don't get me wrong! Somehow the imagine of passing through those IM arches gave me extra motivation to keep running.
I felt great the rest of the day. I was moving around the house like nothing had happened. My husband was incredulous. He kept saying, "you are so ready for this." "Think how you have felt after other 20 mile runs." He's right. I am ready.

I can't believe we are so close. This has been something I have thought about for so long. It was an unattainable goal just a few years ago. Just a few years ago I had a bike wreck that almost killed my swimming forever. Just a few years ago, a Half Ironman was a Huge goal. Now, I'm weeks away from attempting a Huge endurance event.
Hang on Ange.
Hang on to this feeling.......it'll be time to put it all out there soon.

Good luck to all at Coeur D'Alene today!!!!